Fun Things to Do in an Elevator
Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now,motion sickness!"
Meow occassionally.
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!"
and move to the far corner of the elevator.
Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
Say "Ding!" at each floor.
Lean against the button panel.
Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other
passengers that this is your "personal space."
Bring a chair along.
Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
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So much good, so much evil. Just add water. (c)
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